last week i was asked to take photos for an event sponsored by the jewish federation of howard county; the event honored couples in the community who have supported the federation and made it an important part of their lives. i took photos of the same event last year and was happy to do it again. no nerves, no worries...it was an easy gig with little pressure. until the lieutenant governor showed up along with his staff photographer. it wasn't the lt. governor who rattled my nerves but the other photographer: a guy several years older than me, carrying a huge black bag of backup gear, who i imagined had probably been a photojournalist or other "real" photographer in a previous professional life.
in other words, not a hack like me.
i immediately started second guessing myself (he had a flash. why wasn't i using a flash? was the ambient light too low to capture the image without camera shake? do i look like a newbie without a flash? i HAVE a flash, why didn't i bring it?). i found myself listening for the click of his camera to see what he was taking photos of; only once did our fingers press the button at the same time. and so the doubt continued all night.
i didn't want to download the photos for fear of what i might find. but i had to get them over to my contact, deborah, and so i loaded them into lightroom this morning. and you know what? i'm really happy with them. i like the photos i took and flash or no flash, the photos look like ones i would normally take. i'm not a total hack and even if i don't have 30 years experience or a background at a newspaper, i'm an ok photographer. i hate being plagued with self doubt and wonder when - if?- it ever goes away.
my contact, deborah, with lieutenant governor anthony brown:
the lieutenant governor talking to guests at the event: